comfort

Suddenly at a loss of words on how to begin this post but I guess, I'll just go with it ah LOL anywayyy, just completed my 3rd week of work and there's pretty much quite a lot of things going on and stories to say about it but the gist is that it's pretty intense but I believe I'll survive it. And I'm really learning things and being exposed to many opportunities so really just gotta learn and read more and just give my best shot.

I think the most important lesson that I got from these 3 weeks is to not be so hard on myself and give myself time to adjust to work life. Of course, don't take too long but I think also don't rush it. And it's okay to fall short of your own expectations of yourself. Just really, don't beat yourself up about not being good enough and etc. So I guess I also learned that I am not as chill pill as I thought I would be LOL but okay ah, I mean, during work time I honestly still think I'm pretty chill. It's just internal thoughts. Over thinking sigh. Self induced stress, it's really quite stupid LOL

But yes, it's all part of learning more about yourself and growing up and it's all good. I'm really good ah. Just really need to learn to manage expectations. Especially my own expectations of myself. It's okay to make mistakes, it's okay not to know things, it's okay to question even though you may feel that these questions sound stupid. At least you question and not just sit there and be confused but don't clarify.

Another important lesson is also not to lose sight of the purpose of whatever you are doing. I think sometimes when we get too busy and too overwhelmed with everything, we forget the simple things like what are we actually doing this for. So I guess it's really important to remind yourself constantly to not lose sight of your purpose so that you will have stronger motivation to continue what you are doing.

And I also realise I'm really needy HAHAHA I guess when you are feeling not as happy, you really just wanna be around people who you are familiar with, people who bring you great comfort and you know you can just be at complete ease with them. So yes, I really miss my friends and really hope that somehow, everyone is working at the same company HAHA work will be so much more fun sia =(

But it's okay, it's important to meet new people and make new friends too and cannot always be confined in your own comfort zone. Time to really just put myself out there and not be scared of failure.

But yes, also thankful for the people in my life who are really just the greatest. And just people who bring my joy and laughter despite everything. So it's damn important to really just make time for all these small happiness no matter how busy or tired you are because these are the things that actually give you more energy to continue what you are doing.

As much as I really hate to admit it, adulting is really not fun hahhaah but okay, there is the part where you are actually earning your own money and idk somehow spending your own money definitely feels better. And planning how you wanna save up for other things or trips heh. I guess, it will all be okay as long as you remember that you have a strong support system in the form of your family and friends who will always be there for you and that you are really not alone on this journey.

what about angels

[ How unfair, it's just our luck
Found something real that's out of touch
But if you'd searched the whole wide world
Would you dare to let it go? ] 

Not About Angels - Birdy

But how can you let go of something that you never had? Right? And why is it that something real can actually be out of touch? But it really can.

Fate works in the funniest and strangest of ways right? Or maybe to me, it really does. It really feels like it's playing tricks on me most of the time. But it's okay. I guess it's really all part of growing up and figuring things out. Being okay with not knowing also.

I guess I need to learn to loosen my control and really let life be as it is. The future is something that you really won't know what's going to happen. And I guess, that's okay. Don't worry too much and really just make your best out of the present.

And good things are really worth the wait. I believe in this so much. And I see it happening time and again. So I guess it's really just a reminder to myself to be patient in life. In every aspect of life. Don't rush things, don't over think things, don't doubt yourself too much. And have faith and believe that at the very end of the day, it will all be okay. Things will eventually work out in ways that you can never imagine. So okay, the trick is to just take things easy and focus on things that you need to focus on right now and make the best out of whatever you are doing.

Gonna start my first job this Monday and I'm really excited. Though a little scared and nervous to what's to come but I guess I'm more excited than scared. And I really hope that I can do well in it but I guess really just give my very best and work hard. Time to get moving and give my best.