being too nice sucks

It's all said in the title. Being nice is good. It's a real compliment when people say that you are nice. You will feel happy. But when you realise that you are too nice, when people tell you that you are too nice, somehow the word "too" makes a huge difference.

I don't feel like elaborating much on why I suddenly feel this way. It's tiring to take care of people's emotions. You care hell lot for them, making sure that they won't get hurt, they won't feel bad and that they will be happy. You do all things so that they will be alright. But the thing is, you end up hurting yourself. And sometimes, you can't always be there for them as well. You know you really want to be there, but you are no super woman. So ultimately, the one feeling bad, the one hurting, the one being a loser, is you.

But I'll still continue guarding people's hearts and emotions, making sure that they will be happy and won't get hurt. I may not be there all the time, but I'll do my best. It sucks to be me, I can't help agreeing to it. But I'm glad that at least I know how to change things around, how to make myself feel happy again. Maybe I won't be completely happy, but I guess I know how to make myself feel better. It may not always be successful so I'm sure hell glad that I've still got my family and some friends that will always be there for me no matter what, making me smile without me knowing, laugh like a mad crazy woman but I won't care and just continue laughing like a mad crazy woman.

That's when I know, I'll be alright. And yes, being too nice really sucks. But I guess that's just how I am. And I've been like that for so many years and I'm surviving alright with it. Not the best but it's okay.

Sometimes, life is just like that. Deal with it.