Suit&Tie

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE~ =DDDDD Seriously his voice is gahh. Haha! It's really the swoosh feeling. Haha! I can really listen to Mirrors to many times and not get sick of it somehow. Even though it's 8 minutes long. Lol!

Anyway, it's a super random realisation but I realise it's really fun to walk around in a bouncing way. Lol! There is this light and happy feeling when you walk bouncing and lightly. This feel floaty feeling. Haha! Sounds damn funny but it's really fun to bounce when you walk sometimes.

And wahhhhh my friends are really too cute sometimes. Lol!! Some of the stuffs they are really hilarious. I cannot stand it. I will either smile like crazy to my phone outside or burst out laughing crazy on my own at home. Lol! It's really the laugh-out-loud kind. =D Funny, funny friends of mine. =D

you can't carry it with you if you want to survive

9 more days to Koreaaaaaaa!!! =DDDD haha! Seriously damn excited for it. Finally can get away. Haha! And it's Korea!!!!! =D can't believe we are actually going. Haha! I rmb us saying abt it last year and we all know we say only but really want it and now we are really going for it. =D especially since I'm going with those crazy pple. Haha! I think we'll really do damn lame and crazy stuffs together. =D

And ohya, I wanted to say it the other time but I forgot. Guodong, shaohao and changhui are all in OCS!!!! Haha! So proud of them. I honestly feel like some proud older sister. HAHA! But gah, they are damn cute. They met up together and took Shaohao's dad's car to book in to OCS. Haha! It's damn funny! Ok lar. I find the idea really cute. =D like going to sch together like that! Ok maybe it's just us being all sisterly. Haha! But it's really damn cool how they all got into OCS. Like what are the chances sia. I got too pro friends. =D but yes!!! Really super proud of them. Haha! I think I really see them as my little brothers. =D but they can really be super sweet at times. And super annoying too. Lol! Ok lar, they are really like little brothers to me. =D

And then the girls are just sisters~ haha! Sort of lar. We are just always angry and angsting each other. Lol! Ok really like sisters. Haha! We meet up way to often but cannot get sick one. It's really family feeling when I'm with any of them. Laughing like crazy and shouting at each other like mad people also. Dysfunctional family. =D but ok we don't have a mother and father though. Haha! Maybe father is probably Mr Phang. LOL! Okok I shall stop.

And happy and upbeat songs really cheer you up. =D I was listening to Dog Days Are Over by Florence and the Machine and I really feel so much happier. Haha! Yes I'm going to be happier in my blogging again. Lol! I realise my past few posts really like super sian. Too much spare time to think about nonsense. Haha! But ok, my life is still good even though my posts didn't sound so. Lol! I have a few crazy bunch of people who make me laugh and smile like crazy. =)

And FRIENDS the TV show!!! Haha! Seriously still my favourite sitcom ever. Cannot get sick of it one. They are really super funny. =D

I guess sometimes I really need to remind myself that there are other people who genuinely care about me and that I am really lucky to have these people who really care. I know I do know that I have people who care about me. But sometimes, you tend to forget about it when you focus on the people who don't care. So yes, from now on, I will focus more on people who matter more. Because they are the real important people in your life that you cannot live without and you know that you don't want to lose them or take them for granted. Because I realise we really do tend to take the people who care about us for granted. That they will always be there for us so we don't have to bother so much and stuffs. But that really shouldn't be the way. We should never take anyone for granted. Because once we lose them, it's too late to even regret.

Yep, hold on to the ones who matter most. Because yea, you don't need to have a lot of people to care about you. You don't need everyone to care about you. You just need those few who genuinely care and that's enough. I guess yea, sincerity. You know it, you can feel it. So don't waste time on people who don't bother.

"Nostalgia is like a very good thing to me because I like the sound and feeling it makes me feel. It makes me feel lucky to have all of those emotions before and luckier to remember them. "

Read that quote from some friend's tumblr~ Haha! And yep, it's really so true. Pretty lazy to type more. Haha! I guess yea, it's just good to know that you once have all that memories and you know, it's really a happy feeling already. True, we don't get to meet up as much now, we aren't as crazy and mad as we used to be a few years back but I guess yea, at least we had those memorable 2 years together. Something that I will really hold close to for a long time.

Looking at old photographs really brings back all the good old days. Haha! All the crazy nonsesese we did lar. Haha! And sigh, growing up is really not fun. =\ As in yea, all the decisions and stuffs. I honestly still want to be a kid for a long time more.

And I really love how we rather spent Friday nights playing at a playground or sit by the poolside and talk abt nonsense yet important stuffs instead of going clubbing and shit. Haha! Ok, these are my friends. Lol! It's really quite strange how many people of our age are going clubbing all and it used to be a strange idea but it isn't that strange anymore. But to be true, I don't think I'll go. Lol! Ok, maybe once for the experience. Haha! I think I'll prefer bars and pub if you want to drink. The best is actually just chill at someone's house or at MacDonalds. Haha! Having more meaningful conversations. =) And yes, singing. HAHA! Our way of getting high is singing like we are drunk. =D Quite glad that my friends are as lazy and lepak as me. Heh. I like. =D

Somehow I think I lost my blogging feel. Lol! I can only blog when I'm angry and pissed off now. Haha! Ok lar, hopefully I'll find back the mood to blog about other stuffs besides anger and disappointments and shits. Shouldn't let myself feel like that I guess. Because yea, maybe they aren't worth it even though you used to think they are. Quite sad but yea, maybe it's really meant to be like that. Whatever already though. It's going to be hard but I know I'm better than that and that I deserve more than that. And there are people who are honestly way more worth it. So yea, spend my time and effort on these people instead. It's true that sometimes we tend to care about people who don't care about you more than the people who care about you. When I read quotes like these, I used to wonder how can someone not know if a person cares about them a not. But yea, I realise it's actually kinda true. Just remember that you are really lucky and have people who care about you even though there are some who don't care. Contentment. =)

I don't know why I still bother

I think I really need to lower my expectations on people. I always end up feeling disappointed and stuffs. And anticipations. Seriously why think and plan so much when it may all just stop and fails and you just end up sad and disappointed. Why make yourself feel like that? But time and again, I do. I always have expectations from people and from myself. And I always get the disappointment. Ok maybe not always. But sometimes you just thought better of people. I know yes, sometimes it's not their fault to disappoint you. But it just sucks. Especially when you realise that no matter what, your fate with them just stop already. It's really a simple "no fate".

Honestly, the thing about fate is that you really cannot force it even if you try your best to do so. Once it's over, it's over. And it's something that you have to come to terms with. It sucks. It freaking sucks but what to do? Suck it up. The fate with the person just ends there and then. We don't have the control over it and yea, that's it really.

It hurts, it sucks, it takes awhile to get used to. But when you get used to it, you will be alright. Bitch seriously. Lol. I keep using Bitch for everything and anything. Even if it's not appropriate. And I realise my mood swings often comes after my period instead of before. It's damn weird. But it's so true. Somehow my mood always become off after my period. Like I just hate everything. Ok maybe not. GAHHHH I don't know. I just know that right now, I really just want to rant it all out.

Why, why, why is it that at the end of the day, you are still the one who can make me feel so sian? Why are you still the one who annoys me the most? And why are you still the one that I have high expectations for? Like seriously why. I really don't get it. I really just argh. Like go away. Just go away. But I know I'm not the one letting you go away. So what the hell is my problem also right? Argh. Bitch.

And to be true, there are really so many others who are more worth it. I guess yea, at least they seem to bother more. Somehow. I know I shouldn't compare but I am. And I know that I'm partly at fault but you know whatever lar. I don't even know what I'm typing anymore. I just know that I'm done. Yep, I'm done. 

Mirrors - Justin Timberlake

[ 'Cause I don't wanna lose you now
I'm looking right at the other half of me
The vacancy that sat in my heart
Is a space that now you hold
Show me how to fight for now (show me baby)
And I'll tell you, baby, it was easy
Coming back into you once I figured it out
You were right here all along
It's like you're my mirror
My mirror staring back at me
I couldn't get any bigger
With anyone else beside of me
And now it's clear as this promise
That we're making two reflections into one
'Cause it's like you're my mirror
My mirror staring back at me, staring back at me ]

Mirrors - Justin Timberlake

Seriously love this song super duper load. The lyrics are just so so sweet and you know that he is dedicating this song to his wife. =D So glad that he is finally back into the music scene!!! He is really just damn awesome lar. Haha! His voice just melts you. Heh. And his voice really grows on you. At first I didn't really like this song, but then I saw the lyrics and the mv and I just fell in love with it. =D

This thing called love. Haha! I can't really say much about it but I know that it's hard to come by. And if you are sure of it, hold on to it tight and cherish it. It may not always go on smoothly, but since when does everything in life goes on smoothly and perfectly? I guess yea, how these two people can come together and reflect each other. Mirrors to each other. That's why this song is really damn awesome. Haha! It's really true how two people can reflect each other.

My parents for one. Haha! They argue like crazy, and sometimes over the most ridiculous things but they love each other so much. Like you can just tell somehow. Haha! They aren't the chessy kind of couples but they will do funny and cute stuffs from time to time. =D But wah, sometimes the things they argue about is just hilarious lar. I'll be just thinking why are they actually arguing about that. Lol! But it's really true that they reflect each other a lot. How they complement each other and change for each other and just accept and love each other. Quite incredible lar huh. And how they support each other. Haha! Though I think my mum supports my dad more than my dad supports her. Lol! Ok both ways lar. But yes, my dad can be heck of an annoying sometimes. Like my dad can actually be quite male chauvinist sometimes. Even though he is the only guy in the family. Haha! But ok, my sister and I stand up against him most of the time though. Lol! My mum actually gives in to him sometimes. Ok true, she's the wife after all. =D

Sigh. I miss my parents suddenly. Lol! My mum is so nonsense lar. She Whatsapp-ed me yesterday with photos of Hangzhou. It's damn pretty. =( They are currently in China now for business stuffs. Then she sent me a photo of a retarded face of my dad. HAHA! I really burst out laughing like mad. They damn lame lar. I think they purposely sent the photo. Retarded bunch. =D But gah. Miss them. But at least there isn't anything serious in my life now. HAHA! As in yea, that time when they were both not in Singapore when I was having Prelims. The worst period of last year I think. It's really times like these when you realise how very important your parents are. My mum especially. Love that your parents give are just irreplaceable.

I guess love is something that just isn't what I think it is. HAHA! Sometimes I think my idea of it is too fairytale like. Yes, I do want my fairytale-happily-ever-after thing. But I know that I cannot have so much expectations of it though. Oh well, I guess I'll honestly only know when the time comes! Haha! Whoever the guy who actually mirrors me. Lol! It's so hard to imagine though. It's a strange thought. Haha! It's like I want to find him but I'm quite scared too. Like how will you know that kinda thing. But yea lar, when it does happen, you just know it. That's what I think? Haha! There will be this strong push for you to actually take this great leap of faith from friendship to relationship. Quite cool actually. To feel so fluttery yet still comfortable around someone. It's conflicting feelings but you know that it's a nice feeling.

And just a random point to add, some couples honestly look so alike. Heh. In the good way. They just look really nice together somehow. 'Cause I was looking at this photo and it's just nice somehow. Probably because both of them look really happy in the photo somehow but that photo just look damn sweet lar. Heh. Pretty happy for them. Haha! I really gah. I want to really just start taking photos again. I really want to continue to give nice memories and all again. Ok let's not start with the whole photography thing again. It's a depressing way to go. Haha!

Ok, I shouldn't be blogging here since I have quite many things to do. =\ And there are so many things I want to say but I'm at a loss of words. Lol! Since forever. Maybe it's time to get my brain cracking. It's been so lazy and stagnant for so long already. 4 months of inactivity. Haha! But ok, at least I accomplished some stuffs during these 4 months. =D So that's not too bad I guess.

fate fall short this time

Hmm I guess sometimes your fate with some people just stop after a while? It's only natural I guess. Though sometimes it's kinda sad. Like how you want to see them badly but fate doesn't allow it. And how you can't help comparing how last time you and the other person had so much fate.

Yes. Fate for short sometimes. I guess the only thing I can do is get used to it. Because there really isn't much I can do when it comes to fate? I mean yea, I should and have control of what I want and stuffs but some things are just out of my control huh. Some thing that I really need to learn to accept I guess. Or else I'll be sad for no reason. Haha!

But it can be annoying when you thought the fate is over and gone, it comes right back. And it just confuses you I guess. Sigh. Fate huh. Is one heck of a complicated thing that we can never ever control.

Haha! I really LOL-ed at this part of the episode. They are too funny. =D Friends seriously still my favourite sitcom. Cannot get sick of it even if I watched the episode before already.

Anyway, so lazy to update. Heh. Met up with pple. The usual stuffs. Actually, yea, I haven't meet up with a lot of pple too though. Army boys. Tsk. And working pple. Sigh. I really miss quite a lot of pple. Old friends are the ones who you really can never get sick of because you are always comfortable with them no matter what.

Kinda have quite a lot of things to blog about but I'm pretty lazy. Heh. Next time when I have the mood ba! OHOH. I have purple hair now. Heh. Ok not whole thing purple of course. It's like in between highlights and deep dye. But the very sad thing is that it's only obvious under sunlight. =( So it cannot be seen under normal light conditions. Damn sad. But ok, may be redo-ing it some day soon since it's my mum's friend helping me to do it. =D

I realise, ok, I'm quite liking after A Levels o far. Haha! I've been doing a lot of stuffs that isn't what I will usually do. Ok not a lot but you get what I mean. Like if you ask me last year if I want to dye my hair, I will say no. And obviously not purple. Haha! And many other things. Somehow, after A Levels, you just feel like trying out whatever you can before entering uni.

And speaking of which, I will be lying if I say I'm not worried. =\ I know I should be patient and all since my grades aren't really fantastic to be honest. So it will take awhile before they will accept me. I just can't help feeling quite insecure. It's a natural feeling to feel ba! Just hope that I get calls for interview if need to have calls before I go Korea. =\ YES!! Patience is virtue.

Haha! I realise I ended up typing more stuffs even though I said I was lazy to type. OHYA!!! Ok, this one kinda deserve a post on it's on. Lol! Justin Timberlake~ heh. Gah Ok, I'm really lazy now. Next time. =D