tired

I'm tired. Of school, of cca, of friends, of family, of everything. Time is really hard to grab hold. As you grow older, time is really something out of your control. You want to make time for people but you can't. And it's not even excuses 'cause there is just so much things to do that you just don't have the time to do everything and some things just have to be sacrificed. Friendships become fragile at times and you feel tired of holding on to it sometimes. But the thing about me is that I'll always hold on no matter what. No matter how stupid it is of me to hold on. And how even though you are feeling downright shit now, you still have to put on a false excited and happy facade 'cause everyone else is feeling shot as well and you decided to not make them feel worse but feel better in some ways. But then, you'll feel really tired. Having to fake it all. And how some people don't even appreciate you being happy and excited, even though it's fake. Hey, at least I bothered and make the effort to try to make you feel better. So don't come saying and complaining. It's tiring I swear. Having to fake that everything is alright when it's not. But no matter how stupid it seems, no matter how tiring it is on you, in the end, you'll still do it. Because you don't want people to feel like you. You want them to know that they have someone there for them. I know that I have people supporting me so I guess even though I'm tired sometimes, I know that at least I have people who really cares, who really bothers. I really wonder why people just won't make the effort sometimes. And why people just can't take a step back and give in. Yes, maybe the other person is in the wrong. But if you are really angry, don't talk immediately. Walk away first. Because you know that if you don't walk away, you will say a lot of mean things that you will regret saying later. That's why when I'm really angry, I will try not to give a reply immediately because I know that I am capable of saying very mean stuffs. I'll take a step back. Wait until my anger subside before I speak to the other party. Yes, at that anger moment, I rant to other people but at least not to the person I'm angry at. Because if I were to give a reply at that point of time, I know that I'll regret whatever things that I said. And by then, some things just won't be the same again. And fights yes, I'm not saying fights are bad but really, fights just makes people feel tired. Maybe it's my way of doing things. You can say that I'm a coward 'cause I'll rather give in than to fight. But I'm not saying that I won't fight for what I think is right. I'll wait until when I'm more calm, when I think through things carefully, then I'll reason out. I'm careful, I'm not rash. I'm not sure if it's actually a good thing always but sometimes, you really just got to do it. Or else some words said cannot never be taken back no matter what. Ah I really hate this. There is so many stuffs going on that I feel that I'm becoming numb to everything. I care about all to the point where I'm just tired and lifeless and numb. Times like this, I just wish that I can ignore the world and just be in my own shell. CCA. Oh, that's a long story that I guess I'll save it for next time if I feel like. I want to get out. I feel choked up. I need to study. Argh seriously, I want to be rich sometimes 'cause that way, I can just go any places I want when I feel like it. Any country, any place to just get away from everything. Ok it feels better letting it all out. Yes, I'll continue to be positive because that's how I want to live everyday with. No point feeling negative and sad and annoyed by everything. Just let go of all the unhappiness. Really. Why bother holding on to things that makes you feel sad? I guess yea, even though I'm tired now, I know that I won't be tired forever. I know that somehow, I will get through it all. That everything will be all right. I believe. I hope. I have faith. Know that there are people worth living for, worth being happy with and happy for.

don't waste another day

[ So open up your heart, help me understand
Please tell me who you are
So I can show you who I am

You're just standing by
You're just wasting time
Why don't you just tell me the truth
About me and you
And as the time goes by
I hope you realize
If you ask me to
I just might be with you ]

Stop Standing There - Avril Lavigne

Aha, super long since I've blogged. I've got a million of things to say. Many things happened since I last blogged but I'll type those down again someday. =D Maybe I'll mention some stuffs briefly. I realise that I missed my chance. I realise that I usually don't take risks. But thinking about it, I guess it just wasn't meant to be. Maybe I didn't miss my chance but it just wasn't supposed to go that way. Yet sometimes you really can't help thinking what may happen. What could have been. But I know there is no point to it now 'cause you realise that it's really just gone? And you know that somehow, you will be alright. Somehow, you will get through all these, coming out stronger.

So yes, even though I'm alright with it now, I think that we should take a chance always. And not hesitate so much. Take risks. Be brave and just do it. Don't ponder and think too much sometimes. Life is about living and if you always take the safer road, always follow the straight path in front of you and not make any turns or get off the straight path, you will not get anywhere. Take chances. Yes, stop standing there. Move forward. Don't get struck in the position because you won't get anywhere.

And don't walk in a completely straight route. Someone once told me that if we always walk in a straight route, we'll end up circling around and return back to where we first started. I don't know how true is that but it sort of makes sense. Life is about taking chances, being brave, and fight for something worthwhile; giving it a shot before it is too late. We must learn to break away from the norm sometimes, we should be daring and not be scared.

Change your path sometimes. Make life worth living and just be brave and take a chance. Things may turned out to be more perfect than you ever think it may be. Yes, being on a straight path makes you feel safe. But what is safe may not be what is always great for your life.

Yet ultimately, it all depends on fate. But don't always rely on fate. 'cause it will make your decisions hay-wired. Decided firmly and stay firm to the decision made. Don't waver. At the end of the day, even if things may not go smoothly, you will be okay because you have your family and friends with you. You know that they've got your back. So whatever happens, they will always be around.

Friendship is about mutual support for each other. When one person outweighs the balance, I don't know how the friendship may become. It's complicated but I guess I won't give up. I shouldn't and I think after thinking about it for so many days, I think yea, I don't know if holding on to this friendship is a right choice, I don't know if I'll get even more tired, but I guess the only right thing to do now is suck it up and just be there for the friend even if it's not reciprocal. At least I know who I can truly rely on in times of need.

And yes, I miss super lot of pple. Hopefully, I can find some time to meet them 'cause I really want to talk to them. But yes yes, I know that right now, I must and should be focusing on studying. Mid years is coming and it CANNOT be a repeat of terms. I won't let that happen.

So yes, I'm not going to waste another day!! Hopefully. Sigh. I really lack self-discipline at times but I think I'm getting better? I really need to have the strong will to carry on this race, this fight. And once it's over, I want to have a feeling that all these running, all these fighting, is worth it. That at the end of the day, I complete the race to my very best abilities and will be satisfied with the outcome.

The future currently seems a bit blur. I'm having second thoughts about what kind of future I really want. I need to find a day to think properly of what I want to do in the future. As of now, I shall focus on doing well for my 'A' levels and everything else will fall in place somehow. I know it will.

Aha, a bunch of us are going to annoy someone at this late hour on the phone soon. =D Gah, I seriously love these people. They are just awesome beyond words. It's the kind of friendship no one else but us can understand. =)

mad friends. =D

 

Birthday Boy and Girl! They are seriously the most retarded couple I've ever seen. =D But yes, I'm proud to say that they are my friends. Ok, Not always exactly, but since this is their birthday post, I shall be nicer. =D But yes, though I never tell them before (and I never will. At least not in person), they are a couple that are very real and true. Haha! I wanted to say they are my favourite couple but ok, I just can't bring myself to praise them. Haha! But yes, seeing them together is a nice feeling. Initially, it was weird but then not seeing them together now is weirder. There is just something about them that makes you believe that love still exists. Haha! Sounds damn cheesy but yea lar, it's true. Of course, they have problems, they quarrel too but yes, that's what makes them real. And how they come out from the quarrels as a stronger pair. Please don't use all these against me someday 'cause I will kill you. Tsk. But yes, I'm glad that they have each other. Haha! They are both really lucky 'cause they are two really weird people who really complements each other really well. =D

Ok, so let's start the story of this annoying ANNOYING birthday girl. The birthday boy will come later. 

 

  This woman here is really the best man. Forever sleep and sleep and sleep. So yes, I'm going to type out 'cause it's worth remembering. Haha! It's damn epic lar. 

So Weiying created a Whatsapp group for her birthday from a few weeks back to brainstorm on what to do for her birthday. Of course, we digress a lot and never really talked about her birthday actually. LOL! We were like talking about Hunger Games all, and random stuffs here and there. Anyway, so yep, met up with Faeqa and Weiying quite a few times for her bday! Though I'm not complaining 'cause I get to meet them. Heh. Just that yea lar, we never do anything much until the eve of her birthday. I seriously love how last minute we are. But oh well, it all came out well anyway. Except that the main character of the whole plan didn't appear. -_-

So yep, the original plan was the few of us will meet up at 6.15am at Choa Chu Kang MRT. And Feli will come at about 6.30am and we will surprise her and go to sch all. So to trick her into taking train instead of bus, Jiesi told her that Puiling want to meet her at Jurong East MRT to pass her her birthday card at 6.30am. And she bought the story! We were thinking if she would buy it but she actually did.So we were all excited and hyped about it. I was really excited lar! Before I sleep I was like yay!! It's going to be a success all, making her cry in the early morning. HAHA! 

So yep, at 6am, I was walking to the LRT and then Faeqa text me that she just woke up. LOL! So she couldn't make it to meet us. And she was so guilty about it but I think she was more tired than guilty. Haha! Swap went to meet her to get the notebook and I met Swap on the train to Choa Chu Kang so that we can rush some of the things to write in the notebook. And yes!! Swap was carrying the Happy Birthday balloon that we meant to give her!! The plan was really damn nice lar. We would all be at the CCK Mrt Platform then we see her walking up and then we would pop out and surprise her and then draw on her face and hands and legs and tie her hair in a funny way. Quite mean but still nice right? Like will be shocked and all. Haha! 

On the LRT there, at around 6.20am, Jiesi suddenly called me and told me that Felicia Sim Xin Yi just woke up. -_- I had that feeling you know!!!! I was telling Faeqa that wah, if she overslept, it will be epic. And yes! She really woke up late. Tsk. We reached CCK and met up with Weiying and Guodong and yep, we were all just stun at how epic Feli can be. Tsk. Wake up early for nothing. Weiying went off to sch first 'cause she may be late for sch and Guodong went after a while. Swap and I just waited there for her and Jiesi to come. So by the time they came, we would be late for sch already. And lol, there wasn't a surprise 'cause Jiesi told Feli about it on the LRT ride. 

So Swap and I made her more guilty throughout the train ride. HAHA! We were not pissed off actually, it's more of just to make her feel guilty. Yep, we are wonderful friends like that. =D But it's really quite funny to see her all guilty. Haha! She should lor. Wake up earlier just for her and then in the end there was nothing. The disappointment we all felt. Sigh. HAHA! It's ok, we will never surprise her ever again aft this. Too bad for you! 

We drew on her hands, though we wanted to draw more but we failed that it was enough. Haha! Ok, not really but yea lar, we were busy making her feel guilty. And ya, I got detention since it was my 3rd time getting booked. But ok, Feli accompanied me for the detention so it's ok. =D

So yep! The whole day, Swap and I just kept making her guilty. Haha! We are seriously the most awesome friends ever. But really lar, it's too epic that you just need to remind her constantly about it. =D

Anyway, so yep! Our JC friends and I gave her a wallet and a scrapbook thing! =D It's really quite nice. Haha! YA! I have to do 3 things for her. No wait, 4 things! One individual, one primary sch, one secondary sch and one JC. Ok, I shouldn't be complaining but ya! It's really a lot. Quite scary how our lives really coincide like mad. That's why I said I had a lot of things to do that week but I couldn't tell her what 'cause it's actually just her stuffs. Haha!

Aft sch, I went home first since I had nothing on in the aftnoon. At around 5plus, I took 184 back to Clementi to meet Sweden! 'Cause it's round 2 of Feli's bday surprise. Haha! Gah, I'm damn lazy to type out already. It's long. And I'm kinda sleepy now. Lol! Ok, I'll just shorten it. 

The original plan was to surprise her before dance ended, then we changed to surprise her at the bus stop, then we changed to surprise her at Buona Vista. Haha! Luckily Junyuan had dance with her and we had Sharon and Eunice's help too. Haha! So yep, I met up with Sweden to hunt for flowers for Feli. This guy ar, must tell him straight in the face, "Buy flowers for Feli" then he'll buy. Lol! First time buying flowers for Feli lar! Tsk tsk. But ok lar, it's actually ok not to buy flowers but she kinda did demand from him before but he still didn't get it. Haha! Loser~ 

And ya!! It was his birthday too. =( We didn't manage to celebrate his birthday for him proper yet!!! Gah! Must really do it soon 'cause we are really very bad. Hopefully we will find time soon somehow. J2 life is really sigh. 

Anyway, so we went walking around Clementi in search of flower shop. Yes, it's that sad. Maybe if he wasn't too insistent on finding one, we could have saved time and energy. -_- But quite funny lar. 'Cause one of the place which we wanted to go to, the whole building was just not there. LOL! Super funny 'cause we were following the map all but we only saw construction at the place where the shop was supposed to be at. 

And this guy went to run aft a bus to go to this weird strange place that potentially had flowers but didn't. So he bought the flowers at Buona Vista in the end. Joke man! But ok lar, he poor thing. Before he met me, he went to Holland V to get balloon for Feli. So he was holding this Winnie the Pooh balloon throughout. I refused to take it for him 'cause I was carrying the huge photo frame for her and would rather carry that instead of the balloon. 

Met Jiesi and Brendan at Clementi Mall and had dinner before we went over to Buona Vista. We were rushing like mad 'cause dance ended early that day. Of all day right? Luckily Junyuan managed to stall her time a little bit. 

We all reached Buona Vista; Sweden, Jiesi, Brendan, Sharon and Eunice! Then Junyuan and Feli came. This part quite joke lar. We were all stun. LOL! We were supposed to come out to surprise her in groups. Lol! Sharon and Eunice first, then me, then Jiesi and Brendan, then Sweden last with the flowers and balloon. Haha! Sounds quite cool right? But then she saw us, and we saw her and all just stun there for a spilt second. Haha! SUPER JOKE!!! There's a video I think. I should upload it someday when I'm not lazy. =D It's really quite hilarious, how flustered we all were before we saw her and how we just started singing when we saw her and she saw us. Haha! 

And of course, she cried again! HAHA! But it wasn't as bad as last year's. Haha! Last year's one was just funny somehow. 'cause she really cried until damn bad. LOL!

 

 Birthday Boy!!! Who had to travel around like mad for the birthday girl. Haha!

 

Birthday Girl!! With the photo frame that I made! Haha! I'm quite proud of it somehow. Though ok, it didn't take me super long and it's actually quite easy but still! But it's really quite nice lar. Heh. I should do this for my family!! Then we can hang it up somewhere nice. =)

 
 YES!!! She cried. Aha. We wanted to make her cry in the morning but it would actually be tears of guilt. Haha!

Anyway, so since we didn't do much for Sweden's birthday, or rather, we didn't do anything for Sweden's birthday, we decided to cream him! But yes, one thing we learned from this: Know how to cream a person with whipped cream before you actually want to cream them. We were super fail man. Haha! I was hiding the can under this black plastic bag to figure out where to press. The I really couldn't figure out so I passed the bag to Junyuan and he kinda pressed it and the sound came out. Then Feli was still clueless but Sweden heard it and he thought it was alcohol at first. Haha! Then Brendan and Junyuan went behind them with all intention to cream them real nice and gross but then yea lar, we failed terribly.

I managed to grab hold of Sweden for awhile before he ran away. Then I grabbed Feli since well, it was her birthday anyway and it was easier to grab hold of her. Haha! So Brendan put the cream on her hair. Damn gross. And he smear the whipped cream on her face also. Then this girl tried to put whipped cream on my face but her hands were too short. AHAHAHAHA! Really quite epic. Loser lar. But she did the only other thing that she could which was to wipe the cream on her face onto my shirt. -_- She's damn gross.

 

Sweden decided to be nice and let us cream him a little but then we kinda don't know how to use it properly again and nothing much came out. Lol! We damn sad lar. Totally failed at whip creaming people. Oh well, the thought that counts. =D 

Talked for awhile long and we went home at around 9plus! All stinky and gross. Haha! 

 

So yep! Managed to surprise Feli the 2nd time at least. Haha! And had conference call that night with Weiying, Faeqa and Feli. Haha! It was supposed to scolding Feli session. Haha! But the rest slept early. Tsk tsk. But yea lar, we didn't talk for long 'cause we were all tired and talking absolute rubbish. Sigh. I still love talking to them on the phone. Haha! Ok, the best is obviously meeting up with them but since we can't, the phone is the next best place. We always talk rubbish but it's still nice. =D

Ah Felicia Sim. This troublesome idiot. Haha! As much as I complained, as much as I whine about having to do so many stuffs for you, it's all still worth it 'cause it's for you! I'm lazy to type other nice stuffs 'cause it will be in your card anyway and I wrote some nice stuffs on all the random stuffs that I gave you too~ I still love the random stuffs I did for her for the 6H notebook for her. Haha! It's really strips of papers. But I'm quite proud of it still. That book is really rubbish 'cause we are all rubbish people. Gahhh I miss these annoying pple who are forever busy. =\ Hopefully we can meet up soon! Though I just met up with Weiying last week and Faeqa this week. Haha! Can never get tired of them.

So yes!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEDEN WONG AND FELICIA SIM!! =D Yay!! Everyone in Agents are 18 already! =D Ah, miss these people also. We haven't go out for fun since last year. But ok, at least we met up for dinner. But still! Freaking long since we went out. Hopefully soon. I really hate time! =\

birthday of crazy tai tai woman~

 

Joyce!! Her birthday was on 10th April! Same birthday as Sweden! So anyway yep! We were supposed to celebrate during the Good Friday weekend for a hotel stay! But we couldn't make it. But we did something quite funny but sweet to make up for Joyce~ Haha!

Anyway! So yep! We met up earlier on Tuesday morning to do the board thing for Joyce! She bought Mac Hotcakes for us! Haha! And the balloon. This girl who likes balloon so much finally got a balloon of her own for her birthday! =D We hide the board from her at first and she thought it was for Sweden initially. Haha! Got fooled~!

She was super happy when she saw the board lar. Haha! But glad that she was happy! And had a great birthday with us! =) Though we didn't get to spam as much photos as we usually do. Nevermind! Still got many times we can spam photos~ =D

Group photo~ Haha! We took one polariod too but it wasn't as nice.

Funny photo of us together. Haha! Her and her weird ideas of a photo. Took a lot of retarded ones with her. She wanted all different funny looking shots. Joke lar she.

But yep! She is really a happy little birthday girl that day. Haha! Hope she'll continue to be happy and take care of her leg!! She sprained her ankle!! And she still walks around like nothing. Super joke lar. Usually pple will just sit and rest but she'll still walk around like mad.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOYCE~~~ =))

the young =)

My favourite boy! =D Haha! My baby cousin who is going to be 8 years old this year. Time really files. I still can't believe that this boy is 8 years old already! He will always be my baby cousin though. Haha! Though I'm quite looking forward to seeing him grow up, seeing how he will grow up into. =)

My other cousins as well. They are all getting older!! But I seriously cannot believe time went by so fast. I'm older too. I always forget that I'm older too when I see them getting older. I think that's how my grandparents, my parents and my aunt and uncles feel when they see us. Time, it just goes on.

I miss being young. Haha! I know I'm really in no right to say this 'cause I'm actually still considered young. I miss being a little kid, without having any serious worries. The only few things that I had to worry about then are whether I can catch my favourite shows in time, whether I can successfully eat some snacks at home without getting caught by my mum, whether I have enough coins in my piggy bank so that my mum will let me open it and see the money "I made", whether I can avoid being found when playing hide and seek. Ahhh I miss it. I want to be in a state where I know nothing and am only bothered about the small little things in life that doesn't really affect you that much.

But I guess something I like about growing older is being able to see your parents in a different light. And appreciating your parents and grandparents and your siblings. And of course, meeting friends that changed you life greatly, teachers who shaped who you are now and how you think. I guess yea, of course there are still many things to be thankful about. Just that sometimes, you just want to runaway to a place where you don't have to be bother about anything and just be foolish. Haha!

And even though I'm the youngest in my family, I don't seem like I'm the youngest child among my friends. Maybe because my birthday is in January so there is this older kinda feeling to others. Haha! It's nice to take care of people sometimes. That's why I really wonder how I will be like if I had a younger sibling. But then again, I have younger cousins. Or rather, all my cousins are younger than me. Haha! So being the big sister among them can be quite nice. HAHA! The authority~ Haha!

But yes, I will never trade anything for my place as the youngest child in the family. I like having an older sister who been through what I've been through and just knows what to do. Of course, she didn't have anyone else to be there for her and she learn life by herself, but she really learned it well. And yes, she is one heck of a person that I really respect and look up to. My role model. Haha! But she doesn't know this I think. So yes, her 21st birthday is coming up! I'm going to write a long letter for her! 18 years of being in her life and this is the first time I'm writing a long letter for her. Haha! But I'm pretty sure I made cards for her before. I think. Haha! But yes! I actually sort of planned what I wanted to do for her since last year but oh well, hope I'll really have the time to get it done on time. No!! I must really get it done on time or else it wouldn't be that special anymore since she's a person I see everyday. Haha!

I dunno how I managed to type so much stuffs about this. I always get carried away when I blog. Haha! I shall update about the other stuffs that happened!

hold on

Life has been well.. the same. Haha! It's not great but it isn't that bad. There were 3 birthdays last week! I'll post about them next time. They are all quite joke birthday. Haha! Love my awesome retarded friends. They just know how to make you laugh and smile. Even in small ways. And how we really give each other support. I'm really lucky that I have them in some parts of my life. They can't always be there but I know that I have them to lean on regardless of what. And the best thing is that they lean on you too.

There is just too much stuffs that I feel like saying. But time is of course, not on my hands again. I hate how I'm so freaking lazy and procrastinate like mad. I need to really stop being lazy and start. Yes, just start. Once you start, you won't stop. The starting part is just the hardest though.

What comforts me is how people do care. How sometimes you think that you are alone but you realise that you aren't. That feeling is just nice. That comfort. It's just something that warms your heart and let you have the strength to move forward. And hold on to this life and live it to the fullest. It's hard. It's not going to be easy at all. But I know I can get through all these with people who care around me. It makes you feel safe. And fearless. Like nothing will stand in your way. Sometimes, we really have to constantly remind ourselves that we are lucky. There really are people who are worse off than us. Those who have no one with them. Those who did not have a choice in how they want to lead their life. At least we can choose how we want to live this life. And since we can choose it, why not choose to life it to the fullest? And help those who can't.

I really want to do something meaningful to people who are stuck in situations that they have no control of. Ah, I have so many thoughts now but I think I'll better get back to my work.

For now, I'll put everything on hold first and focus on what's in front of me now. Get that over and I can do whatever I want. It's strange how sometimes my blog posts really contracts itself. But yes, I know I choose this road, I have to finish it. I'm not going to give up halfway, and I'm not going to end the race by walking it. I'm going to run all the way to the finish line, and know that my run was worth it, that this whole race down the road is worth it. There are bound to be obstacles along the way but get back up and continue running. Don't stop, don't give up. And run all the way. You will feel that satisfied feeling after you complete the race, knowing that you gave in your very best with no regrets.

Make the most out of all the choices you make with your life. Hold on to what's important. Be yourself, stay true. Don't let people change you. Don't let people tell you otherwise. Prove them wrong.

"There is no failure except in no longer trying. There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose."

Kin Hubbard

wake up.

Disappointment. It is one of the worst feeling anyone can feel. It sucks more when you are the one that you are disappointed with. And when you are the one that people are disappointed about.

I am waking up. I hope I am. I just know that yea, I really need to get back on track. Towards the direction of A levels. I didn't realise how lost I was. Only until aft getting back all those shit results. I think this are really my worst grades ever. As in for an exam kinda thing. I used to be consistent in secondary school. And I know I must get back on getting good grades, not just passing grades.

If I don't want to see the disappointment from my mum's and dad's faces, I really need to work double hard. And just pause all the going-out and celebration of birthdays. It really sucks though, 'cause you really want to do something special for these friends. But I know that I really have to concentrate and focus, even though there seems to be a long way until the next exam but I really must stop thinking that way 'cause I'll end up wasting my time again. Think far, think A levels and work hard. Just yea, focus for these next few months, until As is over. When it's over, then you can just do everything you want to do. And your parents won't stop you too. They won't be disappointed.

I really don't want to see the disappointment on their face. I kinda forgot how guilty it feels when you see the disappointment on your parents' faces. Yes, I don't want to see that anymore. I want to see them being proud of me. But yes, I'm working hard not only for my parents, but more so for myself. I know that I am able to get way better grades than the ones I have now. All I need is to work hard, stop being lazy and give in my best in my studies. This cannot be a repeat of PSLE. Even though it was ages ago, I knew that I really slacked during PSLE. Yet the difference is that I could afford to do badly for PSLE and still end up in somewhere decent. But if I do badly for A Levels, I'm pretty much screwed. So please Yi Fang, keep focus and don't lose track. You know you can do it. Just stay firm and give in everything that you've got.

I'm really sorry to my friends if I can't celebrate your birthday for you even though you guys did wonderful stuffs for me on my birthday. It's really my fault 'cause if I had studied harder, if I was more consistent, I wouldn't be in this huge mess with my studies. I'll make up to you all! I can still make cards and all. Just that in secret. Haha! It sounds so sad. But yes, I can still go out, just not as often. And actually, I think I really shouldn't go out so often. Like my physical geog teacher said, stop all the social life until after A Levels. It's going to suck but yea, if you can't balance both, you just have to let go of one first. But of course, if studying in groups helps, heh. =D

YES!!!! I CAN DO THIS!!! This year will be over before I know it. And my first A level grade will be out on Monday. Sigh, it's to the point where I don't really know what to think about it anymore. I just really hope that my efforts weren't wasted. Yes!!! I will get my A grade. Just keep thinking A. =)

birthdays

Finding Nemo! One of my all time favourite Disney movie. =)

I think I'm going mad. I'm laughing at something that isn't that funny. LOL! Ok, more of amused. Haha! And one thing I love about birthdays is that we get to do stuffs for our friends and we need photos when we do nice stuffs. So as you look at the photos from million of years ago, you'll just break into laughter. Seriously man, the photos have that power. Hahahahaha! I seriously love myself for taking all those stupid photos of pple. Just looking at them will make you laugh like mad. =D

Birthdays are troublesome. Yet it's always nice to do nice stuffs for your family and friends on their birthdays. Of course, if they don't appreciate the stuffs then that's sad lar. But they are all nice pple so I like doing all these stuffs for them. =D

Alright, I think I better go. School tmr. Ah. OK! This week will be good! It's just 4days!!