I have so freaking lot of things I want to type now but I've got no time. I swear if I have the time, I will actually sit here and type a freaking long post.
I'm tired. Physically, mentally, emotionally, whatever it is, I'm tired. In almost every possible way. First, my freaking sit and reach. People don't fail their sit and reach. They just don't. But I, being so freaking inflexible and all, failed it. Of all things, I failed sit and reach only. But I'm actually ok with that. 2 years of training of being called stiff and all, I'm really alright with being stiff. Ok, not fine but whatever, I'll live. Just that when times like NAPFA come, I'm freaking annoyed with the fact that I'm just stiff and inflexible. It's freaking annoying. And the worst part is, I'll have to keep doing until I pass. If I fail and don't need to continue doing to pass, I'm so alright and happy with that. But no, I have to keep redo-ing it. Seriously hope that somehow, I can be more flexible overnight. I WANT TO PASS MY FREAKING NAPFA TMR!
Mentally, it's seriously tiring. All the lectures and tutorials, they are making me really tired. PW OMG. This June holidays is going to be worse ever. Have to cramp so many things inside my head and the thing is, I'm at no where near the start of cramping yet. So I'm more or less screwed. But yes, I will make full use of June holidays for it.
I've got so much stuffs I need to learn too. I still haven't really firgured out completely how to use my dslr well. I haven't really figure out the holga too. Then there's photoshop which I really need to learn how to use it. And there are so many magazines waiting for me to read. My awesome stack of history notes as well. And my sister's econs notes and math and every single subject that I'm taking.
Emotionally, I don't know. I'm just tired. There are really ups and downs everyday. Highs and lows. It's tiring me out. This sudden low and then high again feeling can make me feel like crying. Like something made you low, then immediately the same thing made you high. The sudden mood swings just makes you feel like crap. I just really don't get why and how one thing can make you feel so happy yet make you feel so pissed and sad at times.
And yes, I want to meet up with so many people during this break. We don't get to meet up much so this break is finally a chance for us to meet up. But here's the thing, no one really bother much to plan the meet up. They say they want to meet up, but they just say they want to meet up. They don't try to organise and plan the meet up. Yes, I want to meet up too. That's why I'll plan for one. I honestly don't mind planning for meet ups, 'cause I know that no matter how tired you feel when planning, during the meet up, you will feel alright 'cause you are meeting with these people that you want to see. But then, I just don't like it when you really want to meet up with them, but somehow, the responses they give makes you feel that they don't really care. And seriously, having to set a date just so that it's fair for all pple is hard. So when pple don't reply, it's just plain annoying. Here we are, trying to get everyone together, but you don't try replying a simple sms. It's just really annoying. Even if you find it redundant since you know you will still go for the outing, just a simple acknowledgement of the message will still make a difference. At least, it will make us feel happier. If you think that planning is easy and really wonder why am I ranting so much, try planning. It's not easy. But I guess, I'm just glad that even though it's not easy, at least the people that I'm planning for, they are worth it? After meeting up with them, I'll really feel happy and glad. I guess that's the really rewarding thing about planning for meet ups. It's really the people that makes you laugh and smile again.
And just when you have freaking lot of things you have to do, everything, everyone is wanting a part of you. And then your mum goes complaining all but seriously, I HAVE OTHER STUFFS TO DO TOO. Why is it always that when I am the most busy, when I really don't have time to help you, you must come ask me for help. I WANT TO HELP YOU BUT I REALLY HAVE TO DO OTHER STUFFS NOW. And then she'll go scolding herself for being IT-idiot and make you feel all guilty. OMG. I'm really tired now.
I feel so drained out. But omg, I'm so glad that tomorrow is the last day of school even though I still have camp on Saturday and Sunday. And I realise the most annoying thing about my schedule is that it always clashes or it will be placed way too nicely that one event followed by another on closely.
Ah.. I don't know if I feel better ranting it all. I feel like sleeping now. OH CRAP. I just remembered I need get shoes too. Oh my life. And ah, I want to post about nicer stuffs too but I freaking have no time. I actually realise I wasted quite long on just typing this post. OK, needed a place to rant out stuffs so yep. Ok, I'll sleep first and wake up. Should I?
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